This is not really something I would otherwise have considered writing about, but I guess that’s the point of this blogging challenge. As for life lessons, the main thing I have learnt over the past few years is that life isn’t always rosy. If I’m honest, I’ve had a pretty rubbish few years of late.
Two years ago, I was feeling really lost and had no idea where I wanted to head towards or in what direction. What I really want to achieve with this post, was to let other people know that it’s ok to have times that are shit. You will get through it, and you know what? You’ll come out the other side absolutely fine, and stronger than ever. Whilst there were many days when I felt that I was stuck in a dead end job, had no idea what to do with my life and felt I was a loser who was still living at home with her parents at home at 24. I was seriously low, and couldn’t see any way of getting back up again. I only had the energy to wallow in my state of desperation and all enthusiasm for life had been sapped from me. Somehow, (and I wouldn’t have been able to do this without a huge amount of support- for which I am eternally grateful. You know who you are.) I managed to bring myself up, found an enthusiasm I thought I’d lost long ago and make my way at building myself a new, uncertain future. It has been a slow process, but somehow I’ve got there from a little bit of voluntary work I thought I enjoyed (with a lot of fresh air along the way) into a job that I absolutely love. I just needed to take a step back and reflect on what made me happy, rather than what I thought would make others around me happy.
What have I learnt?
It is ok not to know where you are going.
That it is also ok to admit you are struggling and ask for help.
It doesn’t matter what other people think, just what you think and feel.
Go with your instincts. Life is a journey and you call the shots.
I am thankful for the positive things I have in my life.
I’ve got much more of an appreciation of the little things that make me happy.
It is absolutely ok to do something different.
Things really do happen for a reason.
To quote a favourite musician of mine, Jon McClure of Reverend and the Makers:
I now look back on being made redundant way back in 2008 as a positive thing, rather than the disaster I felt it to be at the time. Without being forced to take a step back and re-evaluate, I would probably have worked in a job I didn’t enjoy for the rest of my life, feeling unfulfilled without knowing why. Yes, I’ve had a tough few years, but I’m ok with that. I’d rather have a bit of a tough time and bounce back than a lifetime of never feeling truly happy. I think once you have experienced real lows, the highs are so much more welcome and I appreciate every single smile.
To anyone empathising with my sentiments, and still feeling lost- keep looking up, you’ll be back on track soon. And don’t keep it to yourself, share your feelings with someone who understands.
This post represents day fifteen of Blog Every Day in May #BEDM with Rosalilium